Thursday, September 5, 2013

The Good Outweighs the Bad

I have had some phenomenal weeks this summer.

My first involved the week where I lost seven pounds.  I still have no clue how the hell I did that.  The doctor looked at my food intake and said, THAT'S WHY!

It doesn't hurt that I have had to eliminate most things free my diet.  That includes wheat, gluten, flour, sugar... pretty much anything with high carbs, lol.  Apparently Atkins on Steriods is a great diet!

Then came the need to buy new pants.  THAT was awesome.  In fact, if you sneak up on me while I am wearing shorts, it only takes a quick tug for me to be pantless.  :-p

My first week going back to school.  The one week a year where we have hour long lunches and get to leave the campus like a grown up and have lunches with our coworkers at restaurants.  Knowing how I have no willpower, I chose not to go.  No temptation is the best way for me to stay focused!

Then there was my last appointment.

Still on my high, I figured I must have lost at least another seven pounds!!  Maybe more!!


Measly two pounds.

Now this is with a diet where I do not go over 1000 calories.  I rarely go over 800 calories, actually.  The high protein intake makes me not hungry.  Before everyone jumps on saying that is too few calories, please remember that I am working with a doctor.  I am taking many vitamin supplement and other medications.

So when I am almost perfect, it drives me insane to see so low of an impact.  It makes me focus on the two small cheats I had.  Could a freaking tootsie roll stop success?  Did the cookie I grab cause me to gain weight back that I might have lost?

It drives me crazy.

I have stopped weighing myself weekly because I found myself obsessing with the scale.  Sometimes I still can't help myself.  However, it doesn't count until I get to the doctor's office.

That is what I try to focus on.

Since June 27, 2013 I have lost a total of 16 pounds.  It has been slow with sudden drops to back to slow.  I have never been as aware of what I put in my mouth as I am now.  Do I occasionally break and have a small cheat?  Of course.  I'm human.  I  wouldn't lose anything if I could never give myself a break!

I know it is working, but I prefer instant gratification.  If I am sticking to the strictness of my diet, I want every week to be a big weight loss week.  Not 2 pounds in three weeks!

A drop is a drop.  At least I am still losing weight.

I just want the award to be worth the deprivation.

1 comment:

  1. Kelly,

    I appreciated this post very much. Having gained back most of the weight I lost in 2010, largely thanks to rupturing my Achilles and not being able to do cardio for the better part of a year, this time, the drop on the scale has been painfully slow, but it is going in the right direction.

    I think often to myself that if it was as simple as just losing seven pounds a week then I never would have been overweight to begin with. As long as it trends down, it trends down. I know that it feels like wasted opportunities when it is only 2 pounds, or in my case, when it is .2 pounds as it has been this week for me, but as long as you are less than the week before (or the month before), then you are doing something right.

    If we deny ourselves every pleasure (the occasional cookie or tootsie roll), we will never last because while it is a lifestyle change that will result in sustained weight loss, neither you nor I are caloric Puritans, and living in guilt and fear of food (and beer) will only last so long before we go the other direction.

    Keep your chin (and your shorts) up and realize that losing 16 pounds is no small deal. I try to remember that if I am disappointed with a number that if I gained that much instead of lost it, how angry I would be and then try to be that same level of happy that I lost it.